My story begins when I noticed a man leading a one man sing song in a carriage. I politely asked him to stop. However, excess alcohol meant his impromptu Karaoke continued with a rousing rendition of Wonderwall by Oasis. I say rousing, yet I think shouted would be a better description. I pointed out no-one else wished to here his back catalogue of 90’s Britpop and if he continued he would be ‘invited’ to leave the train. He responded with a familiar comment ‘You can’t throw me off, because I’m getting off you t@#*’. At this point in the pantomime an off duty police officer stepped up to offer assistance. To my drunk this was a heaven sent opportunity and he launched into a tirade of foul mouthed abuse at the Officer, who never rose to the provocation. On arrival at the next station the man stumbled to the door and asked me ‘How far to Aylesbury’
‘About 7 miles’ I replied
‘No seriously, how far?’
‘7 miles’ I said
‘OK how far would it be if the copper wasn’t stood there?’
Baffled I reiterated clearly ‘7 miles’ but the man was still not happy and asked ‘what if I went by taxi?’
I was by now agitated and said sternly ‘it will still be 7 miles’
‘Oh grow up’ he barked at me and disappeared into the night to the strains of a largely off key ‘your twistin’ my melon man’, leaving me speechless at the train door.
Neat story, I can relate to your bewilderment as many times I have had similar discussions on the train
ReplyDeleteSounds like a really frustrating passenger to deal with. Having an off duty cop must have helped things.
ReplyDeleteHi Ben, he was so frustrating. Because he was drunk there was no reasoning with him, The PO did so well not to rise to the bait, I was full of respect for him. hanks for taking the time to comment.
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